Beverly Hillbilly

Okay…it’s like – Day 192 since Parkes left…and as much as I have enjoyed this time apart…I think I am ready for his return.

I have, however, become reacquainted with the box in the corner of the living room though – and more happily – with one particular show involving one very posh zip code. I hear the opening song - in all it’s synthesizer glory - and am magically transported back to days spent lying about in my one bedroom apartment wondering what my future would hold. Which on second thought – would mean that I’ve come full circle really…though fill in as much drama in the past few years to make even Kelly’s head spin. You name the story line. I have lived it.

Regardless – what I also noted during Episode 3 "The Green Room" today – apart from terribly bad writing – is that the boy I would stalk – if it were me walking the halls of West Beverly- has certainly changed. Circa 1992 – I would have given anything – ANYTHING – to give up my (non-existent even at the time) virginity to one Mr. Dylan McKay. Dylan was soo cool…so popular…if you could just land Dylan McKay then - well your days would be filled with long rides on motorcycles, surfing, and a constant good time. I was always pro-Dylan – the bad boy – the fun guy – whatever you call it – I was just plain attracted to it.

He was certainly far more attractive than the sensitive, emotional, about-one-day-away-from-his-first-period Brandon. There was nothing that put me over the edge faster mid-90s than goody-two-shoes Brandon who always showed up at a party or the beach armed with an empathetic ear and a life lesson for all. He was smart and articulate and good-looking – but didn’t ooze the charm of Dylan…the bad boy…the one that could suck you in and make you feel like you were the one lucky enough to be with him…even if it were the other way around.

Fast forward 10 years…and I find myself looking at the two boys of Beverly in a whole different light. I mean sure Dylan is hot and you could have a really good time with him. He looks great on the beach and can ride the waves like no one else. But he’s also the shallow end of the pool so to speak. He’s emotionally shut off…and though I’m sure has feelings - deep down...somewhere…he hasn’t the faintest clue how to express them…partly since his parents ran off to France when he was still in high school…choosing to buy him fancy toys to distract him instead of dealing with his hurts…his happiness…the things he needed to be taught. No wonder Brenda moved to London. I mean what kind of future is there with a man like that? Sure – you can date him…get engaged to him…hell – even convince him to marry you - but at the end of the day he’s in it for fun…and well…anything over and above that….is just a bit too heavy.

Enter Brandon – whose cheeseball musings and high brow banter always used to drive me a bit batty. Really didn’t like him at first. But you see - as I’ve matured…I’ve noticed that it’s Brandon who is actually the hottie - the keeper…the one who will stick by you during Student Council elections…the closing of the Peach Pit…friend’s drug additions… family emergencies...pregnancy scares. It’s all about Brandon. He listens. He empathises. He nods in understanding. And then he tells you how it is - not always what you want to hear – but how it is…and it makes so much sense and suddenly you feel very supported…and very very much not-so-alone anymore. And you start to notice why he’s so popular - why everyone loves him - because he’s kind. And genuine. And that is a rare combination. Credit his loving family. His good relationship with his sister. His great genes. I’m not sure. But in retrospect - Brandon is the guy you want to hold on to - the one you should tackle life’s adventures with. I mean - yes - there are times he might not be as fun or as carefree as Dylan. He may not even look as good in a wet suit. But when the chips are down…there’s no one better to have on your team than the Student Body President.

And that my friends is what I have learned from watching TV.